Wisdom = A Father

So I haven't blogged in a month, probably because I forgot what the URL to this site is ha :) and I usually get on facebook on my touch now and the link on my facebook doesn't show up on my touch.

Yes, getting locked IN the bathroom and forgetting the URL to my own site, one more strike and I'm out.

The wisest man to have ever lived once said

"There will be people in life that don't like you because you remind them of their third grade teacher, and there's nothing you can do about it."

He also said
"Don't ride your brakes too hard"
"Always look twice before turning left across 2 lanes of traffic"
"You need some music appreciation, here's a Lynyrd Skynyrd cd"

I am so glad I listened to that first thing he said. Because there really will be people in life that just don't like you.

He probably followed it with something like "you can't be controlled by what other people think about you, you can't be affected by what people say, if someone doesn't like you that's too bad for them" but I tuned out after the first part :)

Moral of the story, Dad's are wise. They will say things to you that don't seem a bit relevent at the moment, and 5 years later you'll be wishing you had taken notes.

The best thing about Ethan, he is so much like Dad! I swear they've knew each other before.

My dad always used to quote random things at random moments like:

"Kiss me like you've never kissed me before"
"Something something to fight in the Kumatay and make my father proud"
"You're the cheese!"
and a zillion more...

The other day Ethan and I were sitting in the library studying, when not even looking at me Ethan goes "Kiss me like youve never kissed me before" I almost peed my pants!! I think they have secret meetings where they come up with silly quotes.

I've always wanted to grow up and marry someone just exactly like my dad, but I didn't think that would ever be even remotely possible. But Ethan is! Well maybe not exactly, my dad has a little bit longer attention span and never acts immaturely (my mother might disagree).

But I can already tell Ethan is going to be the kind of dad that gently brushes his 4 year old daughter's wet hair when she gets out of the tub (goodness knows our kids are going to have some good hair) and know exactly what to say when boys break her heart and get teary eyed whenever she leaves for college, everytime she comes home.

It's perfect, perfect for me. If I'm half as awesome a mom as my mom and he's half an awesome a dad as my dad, we might go down in history books as the best parents ever.

But we're not having kids for a good 5 years.

I brag on my parents so much, Ethan has a pretty awesome set of parents as well. That's why we're never moving out of state (knock on wood).

Slow Down Sister

Kindle or itouch? that was the question these past few weeks.

For those of you who are not familiar with the latest electronic devices. A kindle is basically an electronic book. Forget pages and sparkly bookmarks, now you can hold hundreds of books on a small square block of technology.

An itouch is an ipod on steroids. It can surf the web make phone calls, send text messages download hundreds of apps.

So you're thinking, why in the world would you pick a kindle over a touch, right?

Exactly. I picked the touch. Ya know the first thing I did? Downloaded the kindle app. So now I have a kindle on my touch.

This whole idea sparked from me wanting an iPhone and Ethan doing whatever possible to keep me from getting one, since he's going to be the one paying the bill in 8 months.

One thing I've noticed since we got engaged. Oh, have I even mentioned that yet?
WE GOT ENGAGED! On Sept. 12, so almost a month ago! I hope the next 8 months go by that fast.

Anyway, one thing I've noticed is that my dad has gotten a whole lot more supportive of my crazy ideas. I'll mention something to him and he'll be like "Oh yeah sure that sounds wonderful, might wanna take it up with your fiance." So then Ethan looks like the meanie, ha yeah my dad is clever clever.

I'm so excited to be going home this weekend!!! My parents haven't even seen my ring yet!! Or my touch, but that will be overshadowed by their new iPad. touch smouch as my dad says :( at least Ethan was excited!

Something I don't give enough acknowledgement to is my awesome friends. First of all my roommate is really really cool, if you don't know her, you should. She is like interior designer/baker/sporty/trendy/OT student, she's the real deal. I came in tonight and she had made PUMPKIN cookies! Hello!!! Pumpkin might be my favorite thing in the whole world! But that's like a weekly regular for her, there's always interesting breads and muffins in our kitchen. I hope I catch on to some of her ways before I get married!

Now, my parents might be the best people to go to for advice on anything. Really, it seems like they've got it all figured out. Statistically if Ethan and I turn out half as well as them, we'll be doing twice as well as most Americans, relationship-ically if we turn out a quarter as well as them, we'll be doing better than 9 out of 10 relationships all over the world. Those are actual mathematically based statistics in case you were wondering. Therefore, it is safe for me to go to them for advice on everything.

However, there is one other person I/Ethan and I owe a lot to. And that is our good friend Andrew. I think we both go to him for advice fairly often. He's a good guy, and definitely doesn't get enough credit for it. If you ever need advice, just go hang out at a WalMart cart corral, he'll eventually find you.

But the best thing that happened to me this week was: I finally realized I'm still running a race that I won over a year ago. Slow down sister. So now, instead of focusing on a race that's finished, I'm going to start wearing around my shiny metal. :)

Kingdoms

Fall is by far my favorite time of year. I think that feeling stands for 99% of Americans. The weather is perfect, the leaves become beautiful, football is playing in the living room, there are PUMPKINS! everywhere you look. (I love pumpkins).

Fall is my least favorite time of year. I can't go a day without thinking about home. See, winter is easy. Every morning that I wake up and my car isn't lost in the snow and it's above 34 degrees, it's a good morning and one that I am thankful to be in Arkansas instead of Iowa. But fall is rough.

Fall sometimes goes by the alias of "Harvest." A word that makes me think of INDIANS! (I love Indians) and pilgrims and farmers of course. Harvest is the best time of year in Iowa. It's usually 'light jacket weather.' The crops are all in, so the fields are empty. I can just feel it. My worn blue jeans, my soft jacket, hair in a pony tail, the wind nipping at my face (not freezing my skin off), running through the bare fields, being careful not to trip on a stray corn stalk. Heading for the pond with my cousins, to throw rocks, or shoot guns, or fish, or on a rare occasion...touch the electric fence.

One day we were bored so we went to the top of the hill and stood in a row, holding hands, while the leader oh so cautiously tapped the electric fence. Then giggled with joy and screamed with pain as the shock flowed through each of us. Only to find out later we were just mere yards from the source head and lucky to be alive. Maybe that's why were all smart, we zapped electricity through our souls.

I could go on all day, literally, telling stories about my family.

The other reason I love fall is because usually everyone comes home. I mean the two families that actually moved out of state. My family goes back about 5 times a year, we're addicts. My uncle Grant lives in Arizona, he likes to come home in the fall. And that's why fall is so great, we're ALL together, all of us, my whole family. That's when everything feels right, when I can finally feel at home.

If you can't tell from my previous blogs, I have an unhealthy obsession with Iowa and my family. I mean there's love and then there's an obsessive need. It's not good because apparently it isn't going to last forever. Which is weird because it's all I've ever known. But people will pass, land will get sold, things that are now won't be in the future. Then my platform of need will shatter and my heart will probably be broken.

In Iowa there is love, happiness, wealth, health, joy, peace, gentleness. When I'm having a bad day at work, or at school or I'm mad at someone, I go to Iowa in my mind. Sometimes it takes everything in me to stop myself from just going there and getting away from my situations. It's like a safety net.

We all have safety nets. People or places we turn to, long for when we're having a hard time. Our homes, a boyfriend/girlfriend, a husband/wife/fiance, memories of a deceased loved one. We're all looking for the same thing. Love, comfort, safety.

We're all looking for the same thing because we were all made by the same Creator. We're longing for and trying to create things and situations that are abundant in His Kingdom.

John 18:36
Jesus said, "My kingdom is not of this world. If it were, my servants would fight to prevent my arrest by the Jews. But now my kingdom is in another place."


His Kingdom isn't in Iowa. Although, we often long for our earthly homes, they are not the true source of comfort.


Think about this though, you don't desire things unless you already know what they are like. We long for things we've known.


Jeremiah 1:5
"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart."


We've known God's Kingdom. That's why we desire it, because we've had it. Its weird huh. Our earthly minds only remember and have knowledge of here, of earth. But we've had God's Kingdom, we've been there, we've known it. Or we wouldn't all be longing for the same things, longing for the Kingdom, longing for the comfort and the safety net we've already known.

Think about it like this: I long for Iowa, because I've been there because I've known it, because it's my home. I don't long for California the way I long for Iowa. I've never been there, I don't know what it's like. I've heard things about it, but that's not enough to give me the same kind of longing for it.

Alright, so what can we do? We have this desire for His Kingdom, but we're stuck on earth.

Luke 17:20-21
Once, having been asked by the Pharisees when the kingdom of God would come Jesus replied, "The kingdom of God does not come with your careful observation, 21 nor will people say, "Here it is," or "There it is," because the kingdom of God is within you."

Revelation 1:6
...and has made us to be a kingdom...

You can quit searching, if you're saved you have the kingdom of God. Right there in the red letters, it is within you. Cool huh. You just have to access it, tap into it. Let God fill those longings. And don't worry because you are not alone. We are all after it, because we were all made by Him. His Kingdom is in you, He is in you. Seek that and you will not be disappointed.

Ever since I figured out I was seeking Iowa the way I should be seeking the Kingdom, God has filled my life with joy and peace, contentment and health. Everything that I once sought in Iowa and my family I now have overflowing inside of me and I am 526 miles away from them.

Acknowledge the earthly place or thing you treat as the Kingdom, seek God and He will fill your safety net far more than anything this world has to offer.

Sin Much?

God's love has been on my heart lately. I guess that's probably a pretty good place for it to be.

At my job, I come in contact with soooo many people. Growing up at a private school in Iowa I didn't realize there were so many people on the planet. And I definitely didn't realize how many people are hurting, even more so how many Christians don't really understand how much God loves them.

New Christians, religious-bound Christians, lifelong Christians, recents converts, pastors, disciples. I may be wrong but I honestly believe that no one really fully and completely grasps the depth of God's love for His children.

Children. That's a key word here. I think often times we accidentally bypass the idea of God being our Heavenly Father.

That concept is so easy for me to understand because my dad and I are the best of friends. He's my hero. I never ever doubt his love for me. But maybe you haven't had the perfect All-Star dad. Maybe you haven't had a dad at all. Maybe it's been so long since you've been with your dad you've forgotten what it's like to have a relationship with him.

This is where our God fills in the gaps. This is where His love is more than enough to carry us through the heartaches our earthly dads may or may not have caused.

John 1:12-13 Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God- 13 children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God.

Hello! Cool! If you've received Him, you are His. And nothing can change that.

Another topic that's been on my heart lately. Maybe because people up at work have been talking about it, maybe because it's reflected in my own life.

Romans 8:38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present or future, nor any powers, neither height not depth nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Have you sinned? Do you sin on a regular basis? Yes yes yes. I probably sin every day of my life. Who honestly doesn't? Sin has outliers. Thinking a mean thought is a sin, murdering someone is a sin.

Sin is sin. Thinking a mean/vulgar thought and committing murder were paid for with the same price. Death. Sure they have different consequences here on earth, but in the end, sin is sin.

Anyway, back to the verse connection here. As that verse states, nothing can separate us from God's love. God will always love you. He will love you if you're a Christian or if you're an Atheist. You CANNOT escape God's love.

Connect like this. When I lived at home, there were times when I might've bent the rules...a lot. Maybe I stayed out 4 hours passed curfew. Maybe I got pulled over twice in the same night. Maybe I lied on various occasions. All of these sins, I sinned against my dad.

Did he love me any less? No.

Did it make blessing me a challenge? Yes.

Did I maybe feel like he loved me less at times? Yes, when I was sitting in my room grounded.

Did his love for me ever change? No never not once.

If anything he loves me more than he did yesterday.

1 John 3:1 How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!

God's love for us is unfathomable. Whether or not you're perfect. You can't change God's love. However, you can alter how it is displayed in your life. Sin makes it hard for God to bless us. The same way my dad isn't going to give me $20 for some movie tickets the day after I stay out all night.

Sinning is inevitable. That's why we're called humans. If we didn't sin, we wouldn't need a Savior.

We've already established that sinning does not stop God from loving us; however, sin is unhealthy for our relationship with God. It makes it hard for us to feel God's love. I don't know about you, but I need to feel God's love for me. I need to connect with Him everyday. Sin blocks that feeling, that connection. Sin blocks His presence. Sin makes prayer hard, which in turn makes connecting with God hard. Sin makes it hard to figure out what God is calling us to do. And worst of all as I stated above, sin makes it hard for God to bless us. And while I'd like to be noble and say I don't need anything, I do. I need God to bless me. I want Him to bless me with earthly things. I need him to bless me with His presence.

Sin prevents that. But......

The best part of the whole thing is...how easily we get forgiven compared to the people in the Old Testament. Since the price was paid on the cross, all we have to do is ask for forgiveness and for help to change our ways.

How cool is that. Not only does God love you more than your dad does, He cares so much about you, He sent His Son to die FOR YOU. So that you can simply ask for forgiveness and His help. So that all of the horrible things you & I do, every mark we get against us, none of it can keep Him from loving us. No matter what. As a Christian your eternity with Him in heaven is a sure thing. It's a promise.

So no matter where you're at in life. No matter what sin you're dealing with, God is there. He wants to help you through it, so just let Him.

God. Is. Love.

It feels so good to have a home.

I was raised/still am very Charismatic. I've never been in a church service where the Holy Spirit was moving and I was weirded out by what was physically going on in the service. That might be my favorite thing about my upbringing. I'm totally comfortable responding to the Holy Spirit in any place under any circumstance doing whatever He is asking. Even if it might seem embarrassing to some. My comfort zone is stretchy.

The church I am about to become a member of is very different from the church I was raised in. Well, I shouldn't say VERY. Just a little bit different. But I like it. It's a non-denominational church on the move, progressing each service toward the wonderful community of believers God has called it to be.

It's great because there isn't a lot of commotion, but the Holy Spirit is still very present in every service. That's one thing, though, that clashes with my idea of church.

God and His Holy Spirit are present in places they are called upon, desired. Whether it's the small Baptist church on the corner of Main or the 1200 member Pentecostal church on the other side of town. We call upon the same God, He desires and responds to the same kind of praise. He is present where He is loved.

It's like every service at this church is planned for me because the pastor knows it's just exactly what I need to heard. It's just exactly what I need help in, need convicted of, need more of.

For example, this last week was about love. It may sound simple, but loving is hard for me. It's hard for me to love the people I love and the people I don't even like. And I know I'm not the only one who struggles with this, although for a long time I thought I was.

Think for a second. It's hard to love people sometimes because they hurt us, because they don't love us, or because they are just plain annoying at times! It's hard to love because it's hard to put your heart out there, to risk not being loved back.

That's where we're wrong.

If we were really meant to live in fear of getting hurt we would never be able to love anyone. It's not us though, it's not our hearts on the line here. It's God's heart through us. We are a way He can express His love for other people.

Sure, there is a level of humility in loving. Not wanting to love someone because they've hurt you, for example. But that's the thing, it's not my heart, it's God expressing His heart through me. When this divine act of love teleportation takes place we feel it too, obviously, because it's through us.

How do we get this kind of love shock flowing through us? Exactly my question. Good thing I paid attention on Sunday. The pastor said this:

Step 1: Understand how much God really loves you.

Let me ask you this. Do you really understand how much God loves you? I don't think there is anyone who can answer Yes to that. But it might be possible for us to get a better understanding, one that fills the confines of our earthly minds.

So let that be your prayer this week. To really understand how much your Heavenly Father loves you.

P.S. If anyone needs scripture references, you can email me or facebook me. :)

Save Save Save!

Have I mentioned I love my job??



We're the only clinic in this town that is open on Saturday. All day.



However today was a day I will record as an enhancement to my life. All thanks to a 50+ year old man.



He was awesome.



He is an ex-competitive waterskiier. He explained to me how to gracefully go back over the wake once you're out in the open water. He told me how to solo ski and how to ski backwards. He even gave me some pointers to give to my dad about driving the boat. I was super excited.



I told him about the gentleman who told me it was all downhill after you turn 20. This guy said it wasn't until you turn 40. Then he gave me some really great pointers on how to save money. I explained that I save anywhere from 20-25% of every paycheck I get. He said that was great and when I turned 50 I would be patting myself on the back. He told me to invest in the stock market, which is actually the second time someone has told me that so I think I'm going to look into it.



He gave me some good advice that you can benefit from too. Young or old, especially young but don't count yourself out if you're old. He said to really think about what you're spending your money on now. Because when you're wanting to retire and you look at what you've got, you won't remember what you even spent your money on when you were younger. As in, eating out, buying new clothes and shoes, new cars, boats, campers. Every time you go into the gas station, ETHAN, don't buy a bunch of junk food. Seriously, start keeping tabs on how much money you spend per week on stuff that-a month later-you don't even remember buying. Then start putting that money into savings and you will not be disappointed. And it's never too late to start, as long as you're receiving some sort of income. Ethan wanted to go out to eat tonight, but I think we're just going to stay home. Like I said, it can start right now.

Oh My Baby

As you may or may not know, I just recently started working for an Optometrist. I've been working full time so I haven't had much time to blog, but I got off early today so I decided to catch up.

I really really like my job. A lot. I've wanted to do it since I was in the 6th grade. There are 2 things I love the most, number one the kiddos that come in. If you know me, you know I have a heart for the elderly. I mean I like all people, but I really just have passion for the eldery. But for some reason every kid that has come in has stolen my heart. All the boys look at me terrified and the girls just gawk. Yesterday a little boy came in and asked if I had a son like him, and I told him no, then he asked if I had a daughter, and I told him no, then he asked if I was married, and I told him I would be soon. Then he got really sad. I'm pretty sure I crushed his dreams, he was about to propose. Then I took him to the exam room. Which if you're little and you're without your mama, those tiny rooms packed with oversized black equipment can be a little intimidating. I started dialing his prescription into the feroptor when he noticed a tv up high on the wall. I don't really know what they're for, I've never turned one on before, but he started begging me to "Please please please just turn on the TV." I asked what he liked to watch and he said "Cowboys." It was that moment I regretted telling him I was about to get married, I can handle the 13 year age difference ;)

The first time I went to the eye doctor I was 11 and in the 6th grade. That's when my infatuation began. I don't know if it was the fact that I got to skip school to go, or that my dad got to skip work to go with me. Sometimes just doing something with my dad can make it the most awesome thing in the world. Funny how I'm 20 and that still works. I remember 2 things about that visit.

1. Popping a zit in the mirror and my dad laughing that the doctor didn't want my nasty zit all over his exam mirror
2. The puff of air

If you've ever been to an Optometrist before then you know exactly what "The Puff of Air" is, and you're probably shivering right now just thinking about it.

Professionally it's a pressure check/pre-screening for Glaucoma.

Unprofessionally....

Here's how it goes down. I lead the patient into the prep-room. Check their Visual Acuities, Color Blind, Depth Perception, laugh and joke with them, ask them to slide up to the table (still laughing and joking and talking about their interests). Little do they know... Ask them to please align themselves with the machine, ask if they can see the light. Keep talking then kind of slip in "just a quick puff of air" then laugh when they jump to the ceiling. Getting the first eye isn't so bad, it's the second eye, when they know it's coming, that takes a little more persuasion. It's actually pretty fun...for me... :)

All summer my baby has been parked in Iowa. Or should I say raced up and down the gravel roads until she's so dirty you can't even tell what color she is. I've had Rylee's G6 here for several weeks while she had mine up in Iowa. I gotta say, her car is all that and the bomb. It's sleek, cute, and very nice on the inside and outside. But it's only got a 4 cylinder. I didn't realize how much I appreciated my V6. I love driving my car, we connect on a foot/gaspedal/engine level. When you get in you immediately notice the race car style curvature on the odometer and air vents. You start the engine and it sounds like a tractor. You take off slowly down the road. With no change noted in your mind, you look down and you're going 45 and a 35 zone. She's a sneaky speed beast. It's like the air coming through the ventalation system gets trapped in the car and surrounds me, filling my brain with whispering thoughts of "a little faster a littler faster don't you want to see what I can do" Ohh the temptation. I say all of this to justify the three times I've been pulled over (2 of them on the same night) the new set of brakes I had to get and the fact that I've had to get new tires twice. I've had her for 4 years. My mom drove her one day and now she understands why all of those unfortunate events have happened, my dad not so much. It must be something only girls can connect with.